Intimacy COaching
&
Spiritual DirectioN
EVENTS
Some Past Events
4 Types of people
who I work with
Post-Purity
People undoing internalized sexual shame and repression, sometimes called “purity culture,” who are seeking fulfillment and a sex-positive spirituality.
Erotic Malaise
People experiencing “stuckness” in their erotic, sexual, or romantic lives, who are seeking an erotic renaissance, to overcome heartbreak, to open themselves to intimacy, to befriend their desires, or to live more authentically.
Spiritual Orphans
People with almost no sense of spiritual home – either because they have minimal religious background, or because they have rejected what they once had… who yearn to find a grounding from which to grow in new ways.
Mystical Pilgrims
People with some depth of spirituality who want an experienced companion to support them with tools for growth, personalized theological conversation, and accountability to help them mature on their journey into the Ultimate Mystery.
My 2 Approaches
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Comrade
Picture a safe, hidden grove, staffed by a trusted gardener you visit to find peace and to process your inner life. If you choose the comrade approach, I come alongside you as a supportive companion, offering space for deep llstening, an asking searching questions to help you discern and cultivate your own inner wisdom.
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coach
Picture a boxing coach in your corner. If you choose the coach approach, I will help you set goals and proactively hold you accountable to the commitments you have made. My style here is still caring, but is more direct, challenging, and deliberately designed to press you to bring out your highest, boldest, and wisest self.
about me
I am a Yale and Dartmouth trained philosopher and spiritual guide. I have taught and published extensively on the topics of spirituality, community, social justice, and sexuality. I founded Valley & Mountain, a church which became became the first successfully chartered new church in my denomination in over three decades, despite more than 60 other attempts during that timespan. I wrote a regular column at Real Change News on spirituality, embodiment, and social justice for 5 years. I co-founded and led the Collaboratory, a nonprofit accelerator that incubated 100+ nonprofit organizations dedicated to the arts and progressive social change. Through it all my favorite activity was coaching and supporting individuals and couples going through transitions.
Currently I am offering coaching and spiritual direction, not therapy, but am currently expanding my toolkit by working towards an advanced degree in relational counseling, with a focus on sex therapy. I lead retreats and facilitate workshops on healthy masculinity, overcoming purity culture, the nexus of spirituality and kink, and nontraditional relationship structures such as polyamory.
Spirituality and intimacy have been the defining markers of my personal journey. I have been through many upheavals in my own life in these areas, and I bring hard won life experiences to my coaching relationships. I also bring passionate practice and deep study to this work, and I know how to coach and companion others on their growth journeys.
I have nonjudgemental presence alongside an unapologetic honesty the ability to create safe space for authentic sharing and I have the capacity to inspire, disrupt, guide, and support others to make liberating changes.
My chief love is helping people find belonging My core values are integrity, consent, honesty, and liberation.
I look forward to supporting you to name and embody your chief love and core values too.